Beyond 'You'll Be Fine': 7 Supportive Ways to Handle 'I Don't Want to Go to School

Are you struggling with morning meltdowns and preschool protests?  Those tear-filled "I don't wanna go to school" mornings can leave us feeling totally out of our depth. But here's the thing: there's a gentler, more effective way to navigate.

Keep reading for game-changing strategies that will transform your morning routine. You'll learn how to validate your little one's feelings without giving in, offer empathy that actually helps, and provide choices that empower your child. A little extra support can go a long way on those tough days.

How To Respond to “I Don’t Want to Go to School”

Instead of: You love school! You’ll play with all your friends. Mrs M would be so sad without you…

Try: “You wish you could stay home today and instead, you have to go to school. It’s hard for you to get dressed right now. Do you want me to help you?”

Instead of: Be a big boy. Stop crying and get dressed.

Try: ”It can be hard to go back after the weekend. Lots of kids feel that way.”

Instead of: Don’t do this to me. It’s a school day and you’re going.

Try: “Today is a school day. It is okay to cry and wish you could stay home. Tell me all the things you’d do if you were staying home while I help you to get dressed. Then, let’s write the list of home things so we can remember to do them on the weekend.”

Instead of: "You were fine yesterday, why are you acting like this today?"

Try: "Sometimes feelings change from day to day, and that's okay. What's one thing we could do to make this morning feel better for you?"

Instead of: "If you don't hurry up, we'll be late and you'll miss out on morning playtime."

Try: "Let's see if we can get ready in time for your favorite morning activity at school. What do you think you need help with to make that happen?"

Instead of: "You're too old to be acting this way about school."

Try: "Even grown-ups sometimes feel nervous about going to work. Can you tell me one thing that's worrying you about school today?"

Make getting ready easy on the hard days. Instead of having your child get themselves dressed and shoes on, offer to help. Offer to lighten their load. A little goes a long way. ⁣Keep your eye on the goal of getting to school.

Finally, be gentle with yourself. Acknowledge your own feelings of guilt or anxiety when your child doesn’t want to go to school. Remind yourself that all parents go through this. You aren’t doing anything wrong and neither is your child. ⁣

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