The Last Week of Summer Survival Guide: Navigating the End-of-Summer Slump with Your Tween
/I was on a call with a colleague, chatting about an upcoming collab post on how to tell your child's teacher that your child won't be participating in homework this year when my 11-year-old wandered into my office.
Child: "Mom, I'm bored."
Me: "Okay. You can be bored."
Child: "Mom! Can I watch TV? I'm bored."
Me: "No, you may not. Your TV time today is from 1-2pm. We already talked about that, and it's not going to change."
Child: "Well, what am I supposed to do?"
Me: "Not sure, but I'm on a call so you'll need to figure it out yourself. Close my office door on your way out. I'll be done soon."
We're in that last week of summer when camps are done, kids are antsy, and parents are desperate to get back into a routine.
Then my phone chimed with an incoming text, and the exchange pretty much summed it up:
When my call finished, I found my daughter petting the dog and pouting about her boredom. Did I feel guilty? Eh, not really. She's had a fantastic summer filled with trips to the beach and a few weeks of sleep-away camp. But I knew she needed some support to get into a groove and figure out what to do.
I offered to help her make a list of things she could do. She rolled her eyes and dismissed me. I kept going. She has ADHD, and I know that utilizing lists helps her tremendously. I started by "thinking out loud" about things that have helped her in the past when she was bored. Once she saw me writing, she joined in.
Here's what we came up with:
I told her that I had ten minutes until my next call and that if she needed anything from me, she needed to make a choice now.
She decided to bake. She pulled out her ingredients and asked for help preheating our new oven. Then she turned on an audiobook on Alexa, and she got to work.
Despite a few little hiccups, my next call was mostly uninterrupted. She baked her brownies and then called a friend to come over. They slid down the stairs on our Nugget, had a lemonade stand, played with the dog and the hose outside, and then cuddled their wet swimsuit bodies under a blanket on the couch and watched TV during her allotted time.
Did they kind of destroy my kitchen? Yes.
Is my couch damp? Also yes.
Did they have fun and entertain themselves for most of the day? Hell yes!
As parents, we often feel pressured to constantly entertain our kids, especially during those awkward transition periods like the end of summer. But sometimes, the best thing we can do is step back and let them figure things out on their own. By offering guidance without taking over, setting clear boundaries, and providing tools, we empower our children to tackle their own boredom.
The result? Kids who are more self-reliant, a (slightly) less stressed parent, and maybe a batch of brownies. Sure, you might end up with a messy kitchen or a damp couch, but you'll also have a child who's learning to navigate the world independently – and that's worth its weight in gold (or brownie batter).
To help you navigate your end-of-summer slump, I made you a checklist of strategies:
Acknowledge their feelings without immediately solving the problem
Maintain set boundaries (like screen time limits)
Encourage independence in finding solutions
Offer to brainstorm ideas together
Create a list of possible activities
Provide a mix of solo and social options
Set a time for parental availability
Allow for some mess- it’s inevitable
Celebrate their initiative and problem-solving authentically
Has your child requested an item this holiday season that you are not on board with? Read this.